Birthday blogs have seem to become a thing for me. Last year I just ranted but when I think back on where I was, I was justified. That’s what I like to do with these apparently annual posts- not rant, but rather reflect on the year gone by.
My 22nd year has been a dosie for sure and my birthday seems to have sprung on me. Like I said last year at this time I was exiting a very unhealthy manipulative place in my life. I was left bitter by hardened hearts and took up a job as a nanny, lending to a summer mostly of solitude- seeing as the company of a 4 and 5 year old is not quite dynamic.
The best thing in this past year has been the travels. I’ve been to Kansas City twice, Louisville, New York City, of course Columbus, Detroit, Cleveland, Pittsburgh and most recently Los Angeles. I can’t seem to help myself from traveling. I get restless if I haven’t been somewhere new in awhile.
At this stage, I’ve been trying to figure out what to do with my life. Do I base my life off a community, a city, a career? I’m currently a journalist, living at home, with a long-distance community (blog post on this is forthcoming). Which is crazy that its real if I actually think about it. I’m getting paid to write, I’m trusted with much responsibility and I’m published almost daily. Yet missing the community and city aspects and creativity has continued to leave me pondering where enjoyment lies. I’ve moved before based on community which turned into staying in the city for location- neither was satisfying, though there were external influences in play.
On my travels to LA I was blessed with the opportunity to meet with Lauren Lankford Dubinsky, the founder of The Good Women Project and a women I highly regard. She gave me advice to plan my life one year at a time instead of in its entirety. To ask where do I want to be in one year, and not necessarily in a physical location sort of way. Returning home, I have instead of focusing on determining the rest of my life, been trying to consider this question.
Honestly I feel like a completely different person than who I was one year ago. I feel much more confident in myself as a person. I feel like I have had a huge gulp of my own resilience and have astounded even myself. So while I am always trying to figure out my life, I feel like I have been refreshed in my mentality. I will not be stuck where I am or grow complacent. Here I am in luxury in many ways- I want to keep up this realization of abundance.
I hope, come my birthday next year, that I am walking in even greater confidence and still consciously reliant on God. I hope to have taken risks to follow my heart and passions. I hope that no matter where I am, or what I am doing, or who I am with, that I will have a better grasp on faith and love. I want this to be a year of gaining hope. I feel like it is impending… in a good way. I have a feeling that at the end of this year I will have gone places and done things I never imagined. I’m excited. Here’s to 23!